Do you ever feel mixed emotions in anticipation of the holidays? 

They can bring immense joy, but they can also be a source of grief and stress for most adults! The American Psychology Association actually found that 63% of adults used negative words (e.g. “stressful,” “overwhelming,” and “exhausting”) to describe the holidays. 

So why is that?

Each person has their reasons, of course. It can be because of an overly busy schedule, missing loved ones, or holding certain memories associated with this time of year. All of that can make the mixed emotions intense—especially when we feel pressure to celebrate! 

The stress can show up in our bodies, which might feel more lethargic between Thanksgiving and New Year’s. This can be caused by changes in our diet, sleep, and habits over the holidays, but it also could be a result of holding unresolved trauma associated with this time of year. 

Trauma can be re-experienced in our bodies through present-day associations and memories that trigger our nervous system to react as if the original trauma is happening right now.  This is an autonomic response below the surface, experienced subconsciously.  It is up to us to listen to our bodies (which requires us to be present), identify the sensations, and question them for relevance in the here and now.  

Then remember, we have a choice to offer ourselves the compassionate resourcing necessary to settle our bodies.  

It’s so important to acknowledge all of this so we can normalize a healthier perspective going into the holidays. Maybe by normalizing it, we can more fully embrace all the fun and joy wrapped up around the corner.   It can be a beautiful time to connect with loved ones and reflect on the meaning of gratitude and the upcoming gift of Jesus Christ.

We want you to be able to enjoy the holidays as much as possible (if you want to). So as the season begins, here are a few tips for creating healthy holiday rhythms. 

Prioritize Connection Over Perfection

The quality of our relationships has been proven to be the best determinant of health (more than exercise and nutrition).  Connection allows us to release hormones like oxytocin, the “love hormone” used to form bonds and build trust, as well as other hormones like dopamine, serotonin, and endorphins that all contribute to our overall sense of pleasure and well-being.  

Co-regulation can happen when a settled person can help soothe another person to become more emotionally regulated again. Essentially, we have the ability, through our own settled bodies, to help calm people around us! (Of course, we can also give the opposite effect, especially when we’re struggling with our mental well-being or busy schedules). 

Thanks to “mirror neurons”, when one person exhibits a positive behavior or emotion, it encourages us to mirror that emotion.  It can be as simple as adapting your tone when talking with a friend or communicating empathy when supporting a friend through a difficult time. The Duke Center for Child and Family Policy describes co-regulation as being “recognized for its foundational role in promoting wellbeing across the lifespan…”

Compassionate Resourcing for Co-Regulation

• Make a habit of studying one proverb a day
• Deep belly breathing
• Physical touch to the area of your body that holds tension or constriction 
• Stretch or walk (with a buddy!)
• Connect with a trusting relationship
• Invest more time with calm people who leave you feeling good
• Warm epsom salt bath
• Massage
• Cold plunges

Create Extra Margins in Your Schedule

When the holidays come around, it’s very easy for our already busy schedules to get even busier. Consider scheduling less than you normally would or commit to nothing new until January 1 to account for the new gatherings and to-do lists that will likely pop up. This will give you space to actually look forward to that holiday party instead of feeling stressed about it! 

By intentionally creating more margins ahead of time, you can help reduce your stress response throughout the season. 

Stop Fasting & Try Meal Sequencing! 

During the holidays, we often eat lots of delicious foods that we don’t have very often. 

We discourage skipping meals before big gatherings. Instead, eat a balanced breakfast and lunch to keep the fire of your metabolism burning all day rather than slowing it down during periods of fasting. Your metabolism will work more efficiently and you are unlikely to overeat if you are already nourished beforehand. 

While we should feel free to enjoy holiday treats in moderation, we don’t want to feel lethargic or experience unnecessary spikes in blood sugar, sometimes referred to as diabesity. We are big fans of food sequencing, a technique that can help reduce higher blood sugar levels. To maintain healthy sugar levels, try eating protein and veggies first and carbohydrates last. Ask your Functional Medicine Provider for tips on this technique!

With the help of some pre-emptive strategies, we hope you can start the holidays off as you deserve to: with joy, gratitude, and love.

Whenever you need to talk, our team is here for you. 

Wishing you abundance,
Ashlee Seek & Jamie Schofield
Co-Founders & CEOs

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